no smoking count

6 days!

"...it looks like a fist, wrapped in blood!"

Larry: "Have you ever seen a human heart?? It looks like a fist, wrapped in blood!"

I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.

This past Sunday I visited my friend Ziggy who is suffering from cancer and just underwent his most recent round of chemo/radiation. Right now Zig is partially paralyzed, at least temporarily if not permanently, due to a tumor on his spine. I sat next to him a while massaging his hand and talking to him a while and hoping he knows how much he's loved. When I got there with Justin there was a woman (who I later learned was a hired practitioner of reiki) leading Ziggy's twenty-something visitors in a group prayer. We were all instructed to put our hands on his body and focus on sending good energy and chant "I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you." This shit was too much.

I'm quitting smoking. It's cliche I know, and it's only been three days so far but my last one was Sat (08/29/09) morning, and I don't ever want to smoke again. I love you Zig, so so much.